Ever had one of those weeks where nothing really monumental happened except for job-hunting, and every other thought was just too introspective for the blog? Yeah.
So I gamed instead! =D
GAME DESECRATION HOUR (spoilers, yaddayaddayadda)
Game: Genji (click for pictures)
Genji is about the Japanese historical figure Minamoto no Yoshitsune and his loyal vassal, fighting monk Saito Musashibo Benkei. Now obviously when you have a man and his loyal servant (both unmarried), the minds of fangirls go to where no heterosexual fanboy dare venture and imagine them in the strangest kinks involving sweaty writhing naked bodies.
The developers probably wanted to block this awful thought and stay close to history at the same time, thus making Benkei a shiny-headed 8-foot giant who wields building poles and various other spears and lances. What they DIDN'T bank on was having Benkei's weapons look phallic. but to some, anything remotely long and thick will be phallic anyway, so we shan't bother.
.jpg "benkei")
Phallic weapons and marbles, it's a thinly-veiled yaoi game really...>_>;;
Back to story.
So there is Yoshitsune, the two-sworld wielding bishie with the impossible lightweight hair/dreadlocks/extensions/what have you, and there is Benkei, the bald monk who walks slower than a tank without fuel. There is a war, and there is an evil man using a sacred artifact known as Amahagane (heaven steel), which just looks like glowy marbles of POWER.
Phallic weapons and marbles, it's a thinly-veiled yaoi game really...>_>;;
Back to story.
So there is Yoshitsune, the two-sworld wielding bishie with the impossible lightweight hair/dreadlocks/extensions/what have you, and there is Benkei, the bald monk who walks slower than a tank without fuel. There is a war, and there is an evil man using a sacred artifact known as Amahagane (heaven steel), which just looks like glowy marbles of POWER.
So Yoshitsune and Benkei discover they both have glowy marbles of POWER, and then an old man tells them to collect these glowy marbles of POWER to ensure the future of Japan never falls into the hands of demons or somesuch. His daughter (or granddaughter? Loli bait? Saaa) just hangs around and looks...well...loli.
.jpg "loli")
GAN TAKE NOTE XD
There is also a badass ninja right at the beginning of the game who never does anything badass after saving Yoshitsune and is then relegated to the sad role of Marble Fuser Who Gets Caught By The Enemy. One would think they COULD be a couple, but the game ends before anything happens
.jpg "marble fusion")
Forget the hot babe and keep asking her to fuse your marbles, ya pervs... =_=;
GAN TAKE NOTE XD
There is also a badass ninja right at the beginning of the game who never does anything badass after saving Yoshitsune and is then relegated to the sad role of Marble Fuser Who Gets Caught By The Enemy. One would think they COULD be a couple, but the game ends before anything happens
Forget the hot babe and keep asking her to fuse your marbles, ya pervs... =_=;
The general uselessness of these women in the story would make any fangirl insist that Yoshitsune and Benkei ARE getting it on together, but there is no time for that because they. Are. FIGHTING!!
.jpg "combat")
See the pretty colours! *_*
In between bits of FMV and talking, our two heroes generally jump around and slash/whomp the hell out of everything that moves while looking for small stones with which to improve stats, as well as generally level up. Yoshitsune is the uke, so he gets the power to jump up roofs, while Benkei, being a tank without fuel, just mows his way through rocks, locked doors, and other heavy implements. As one can imagine, I prefer Yoshitsune because he's bishie and he can JUMP and he's got the nifty two-sword thing going for him, funky hair extensions be damned.
.jpg "jumping")
*hopskipjumptwirlprance*
The fighting system for this game isn't like other games. In other games, you move your character around slashing things apart while jumping and somersaulting and putting on a show for your audience. This game knows you are a samurai, and you should fight like a samurai: One Hit Kills.
.jpg "1hit-kill")
I KEEL J00 >(
So there's a gauge at the bottom which is the Kamui gauge, which when you activate with R1, the action slows down, the enemies all get ready, and CHARGE at you, and your job is to look for the big SQUARE button indicator to press, and your chara will one-hit-kill everyone until you screw up (then you take twice the damage), or everyone dies and you look like a badass in an old samurai movie complete with falling sakura petals, flourish, pose, and b&w colours. It's so gorgeous, I couldn't find a pic - prolly because everyone's so much in awe they forget to take a screenshot.
And basically that's the game - you traipse through trying to one-hit kill all the way through, and amidst all the fighting, there is no attempt at romance, which disappoints Evilmatter greatly because there is a HOT NINJA MARBLE FUSER and they are not cultivating a relationship! Instead all they do is look at the loli! What the hell! >(
So...how is it?
.jpg "scenery")
*__*
Graphically the game is beautiful, the charas move smoothly, there is no slowdown, the music is nice, blah blah blah, it's short, but it's short enough that you don't mind replaying it immediately, which is always a good thing, since when you complete the game, you unlock movies and music and a suicidal hard mode where if you can finish it you unlock artwork. I haven't finished it yet because now I'm STUCK. =_=++ *Mutter grumble snarl*
See the pretty colours! *_*
In between bits of FMV and talking, our two heroes generally jump around and slash/whomp the hell out of everything that moves while looking for small stones with which to improve stats, as well as generally level up. Yoshitsune is the uke, so he gets the power to jump up roofs, while Benkei, being a tank without fuel, just mows his way through rocks, locked doors, and other heavy implements. As one can imagine, I prefer Yoshitsune because he's bishie and he can JUMP and he's got the nifty two-sword thing going for him, funky hair extensions be damned.
*hopskipjumptwirlprance*
The fighting system for this game isn't like other games. In other games, you move your character around slashing things apart while jumping and somersaulting and putting on a show for your audience. This game knows you are a samurai, and you should fight like a samurai: One Hit Kills.
I KEEL J00 >(
So there's a gauge at the bottom which is the Kamui gauge, which when you activate with R1, the action slows down, the enemies all get ready, and CHARGE at you, and your job is to look for the big SQUARE button indicator to press, and your chara will one-hit-kill everyone until you screw up (then you take twice the damage), or everyone dies and you look like a badass in an old samurai movie complete with falling sakura petals, flourish, pose, and b&w colours. It's so gorgeous, I couldn't find a pic - prolly because everyone's so much in awe they forget to take a screenshot.
And basically that's the game - you traipse through trying to one-hit kill all the way through, and amidst all the fighting, there is no attempt at romance, which disappoints Evilmatter greatly because there is a HOT NINJA MARBLE FUSER and they are not cultivating a relationship! Instead all they do is look at the loli! What the hell! >(
So...how is it?
*__*
Graphically the game is beautiful, the charas move smoothly, there is no slowdown, the music is nice, blah blah blah, it's short, but it's short enough that you don't mind replaying it immediately, which is always a good thing, since when you complete the game, you unlock movies and music and a suicidal hard mode where if you can finish it you unlock artwork. I haven't finished it yet because now I'm STUCK. =_=++ *Mutter grumble snarl*
In any case, it's a nice game, and I don't see why you shouldn't just go get the Japanese version (kanji be damned), because you know when this game comes out in English, you'll have to count your blessings to hope they're kind enough to leave in the Japanese track. Either that, or the dubbing will be SO GOOD like FMA 2, you will forget that there was a Japanese version to begin with. Still, english voices in a story about medieval Japan....
...I want to be proven wrong for once, really.
...I want to be proven wrong for once, really.